Friday, February 18, 2011

Think (In)Different

Its really vital to take some time out of your day and put your thoughts in the Witness Protection Program. Over thinking is never healthy. You over-analyze, compose infusible scenarios in your head, and bring up some things that should not be brought up that prone you to replace your lunch with Prozac.

Over-thinking can cogently decay any sort of good mood and scrutiny of situations can impel you to make rash decisions that you may regret later. So, to avoid this conundrum its pertinent you take some time out of your day to purge your thoughts away and find something that'll make you feel infallibly happy.

For me, its really important to saturate my day with a lot of music. Of course its not dandy all the time. Sometimes you just want to bake a cake and cry about something irrelevant. But for the most part, its how I keep myself sane. I constantly fall victim to over thinking and it never arrives to a good conclusion. But theres a difference between over thinking and healthy thinking. The thinking that occurs in the shower/car driving is THE BEST. The light bulb goes off the brightest during these places.

But if you're in your bat cave of a room thinking about some douchecrouton who parallel parked over your heart with an 18 wheeler 3 years ago: that is not good.

So take time out of your day to relax and do something that'll make you feel like you can conquer the world.


Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Yahoo: Google's Less Attractive Brother

Thanks to the power of blogging and the first amendment I can now tear Yahoo a new one. Ok, first of all Yahoo news sucks a majority of the time. Dovetailing headlines that go from fashion mistakes made on the Golden Globes to your eating habits that will most likely lead to cancer or a third nipple are affluently inane and meaningless.  Why are they featuring Kim Kardashian's new haircut like it was Sputnik all over again?

Ok, Justin Timberlake is about as relevant as dial-up internet. The article above was four stories ahead of the crisis prevailing in Egypt. Unlike other credible news outlets, Yahoo does not address the underlying logic and coherence that governs the structure, language, and content of a reliable news source, and instead garnishes their page with irrelevant poppycock like this:

WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? Whoever wrote that can go make out with a bunsen burner. Unfortunately, Yahoo news is shamefully reflective of the American population and how we would rather read about what Charlie Sheen is doing with his prostitutes instead of global events that actually have an impact on our lives. 

Ok, so the Brazilians aren't fans of unpunctuality. Neither is every other person. Not front page worthy. Grow a pair of Golden Globes. 

One more thing, is a blind nun running Yahoo's fashion section? A lot of gorgeous and breath taking garments receive low ratings. I mean if I were ridiculed and shit talked about something I wore, I would be more affected if it came from a prominent fashion designer than the fuckery that comes from Yahoo. 

Also, its painfully obviously that Yahoo is bias and likes some celebrities more than others with rhetoric  undermining negative/positive opinions, violating news reporting's number one code of conduct of being objective.  

So in conclusion, Yahoo and Fox should go fornicate and have a useless child. Oh wait they did, his name is Glenn Beck.

Brb, I'm going to go read about how watching paint dry can cause me to get SARs.