Thursday, October 4, 2012

People Who Would Make A Better President Than Mitt Romney

Anderson Cooper

Judy Blume

A drunk Huguenot

Victoria (Beckham or 's secret)

A roll of Charmin Ultra (FLORAL SCENTED)

A peeled grape

Terry Schiavo

Your local barista

Simba

Jake Gyllenhaal

Jake Gyllenhaal's pants

Jake Gyllenhaal's divinely proportioned pectorals

Jake, why won't you love me, Jake?!

A crouton

Your drunk uncle that asked you to play "Tetris" in the basement during Thanksgiving of '96

Squanto

50 Shades of Grey (HARDCOVER)

Apple (actual fruit and/or Gwyneth Paltrow's daughter)

Kathy Griffin's cameltoe

Cars 2

Someone who is not a homo/women/Mexican/dog/poor people phobic twat

3 comments:

  1. Crouton for President...BUT ONLY THE FAT FREE BUTTER MILK RANCH FLAVOR!

    DO YOU HEAR ME BITCH?! FUCKING BUTTER MILK RANCH.

    WITH RUNNINGMATE PEELED GRAPE. THE GREEN KIND.

    Together they'll make a crunchy squishy tangy sweet SAVORY America.

    safe for the mexicans and homos <3

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. WITH A TASTY ARRAY OF SAUCES IN SENATE.

      Delete
  2. HAHAHAHAHA omg Greg this so seriously so funny. <3

    ReplyDelete